A very special edition of Roman's Movie Review

Salt- I generally like the genre.... I hated this.

 

 

The Losers- Oh Hell Yeah!

 

 

So both are basically CIA shoot em ups, both with unbelievable, impossible scenarios (By the time Salt was 20 minutes in I had announced to my family "Yeah.... She would have died right there," about 48 times. Likewise, The Losers are put in impossible scenarios, and shoot their way out of them-and theyre even up against make beleive super weapons- the "SNUKE") yet I LIKED the LOSERS, and I hated the SALT.... Why?

 

The Losers didnt TAKE ITSELF SERIOUSLY.... It had a comic book feel to it, that I thought the director really pulled off (And I LOVED Jason Patric as the Super-Villain MAX- He steals every scene hes in)... Salt took itself way to seriously, and I find Jolie to be a humorless shrew. I knew how SALT would end an hour before it did, and waiting for Liev Schreiber (who I normally also really like) to finally reveal himself as the big bossman was like watching flies fcuk for 90 minutes- You know how its going to end, but you're still basically staring at a pile of dogshit til its over.

Salt- I generally like the genre.... I hated this.

 

 

The Losers- Oh Hell Yeah!

 

 

So both are basically CIA shoot em ups, both with unbelievable, impossible scenarios (By the time Salt was 20 minutes in I had announced to my family "Yeah.... She would have died right there," about 48 times. Likewise, The Losers are put in impossible scenarios, and shoot their way out of them-and theyre even up against make beleive super weapons- the "SNUKE") yet I LIKED the LOSERS, and I hated the SALT.... Why?

 

The Losers didnt TAKE ITSELF SERIOUSLY.... It had a comic book feel to it, that I thought the director really pulled off (And I LOVED Jason Patric as the Super-Villain MAX- He steals every scene hes in)... Salt took itself way to seriously, and I find Jolie to be a humorless shrew. I knew how SALT would end an hour before it did, and waiting for Liev Schreiber (who I normally also really like) to finally reveal himself as the big bossman was like watching flies fcuk for 90 minutes- You know how its going to end, but you're still basically staring at a pile of dogshit til its over.

 

Agree about Salt taking itself too seriously and pushing the suspension of disbelief too far with Jolie's stunts. BTW, did you like the way she jumped her way down the elevator shaft at the end?? That's gotta be the best.

 

Will check out The Losers.

Agree about Salt taking itself too seriously and pushing the suspension of disbelief too far with Jolie's stunts. BTW, did you like the way she jumped her way down the elevator shaft at the end?? That's gotta be the best.

 

Will check out The Losers.

 

 

At that point Id given up on the movie....

 

And a note to all the law enforcement agencies who keep arresting her- Dont spend so much time finding those extra long handcuffs with 40 chain links in them to use on her, because, shes a super ninja and keeps using that to her advantage.... Better to just go with the off the shelf three link cuffs every cop in America has been using for the last century and a half....

It's a shame you don't really got to the cinema, your reviews could potentially save me a lot of time and money

You have such a delicate turn of phrase .....

 

..... I find Jolie to be a humorless shrew.

 

...... was like watching flies fcuk for 90 minutes- You know how its going to end, but you're still basically staring at a pile of dogshit til its over.

 

I wish I could summon up such articulate vitriol for use in many everyday situations. However I have added these to the thesaurus.

 

Perhaps you could write you own profanisaurus, a bit like Roger's;

 

http://www.viz.co.uk/profanisaurus.html

You have such a delicate turn of phrase .....

 

 

 

I wish I could summon up such articulate vitriol for use in many everyday situations. However I have added these to the thesaurus.

 

Perhaps you could write you own profanisaurus, a bit like Roger's;

 

http://www.viz.co.uk/profanisaurus.html

 

 

I would agree. Because I am definitely stealing the line about fly's fcuking

Trivia about Salt. It was written for Tom Cruise but he turned it down because he felt it was too much like his MI franchise so it was rewritten for Jolie.

Trivia about Salt. It was written for Tom Cruise but he turned it down because he felt it was too much like his MI franchise so it was rewritten for Jolie.

and they really stretched the imagination on rewriting it, Tom Cruise's name, Edwin A. Salt.

You have such a delicate turn of phrase .....

 

 

 

I wish I could summon up such articulate vitriol for use in many everyday situations. However I have added these to the thesaurus.

 

Perhaps you could write you own profanisaurus, a bit like Roger's;

 

http://www.viz.co.uk/profanisaurus.html

 

My wife would have to write it.... Shes the one that gets to hear most of my Romanisms. I dont really think about them when I say them.... I just try to speak and write in the most descriptive manner I can think of- I always try to paint a "Word Picture" for my listener, and that's what comes out.

 

Salt- I generally like the genre.... I hated this.

 

 

...and waiting for Liev Schreiber (who I normally also really like) to finally reveal himself as the big bossman was like watching flies fcuk for 90 minutes- You know how its going to end, but you're still basically staring at a pile of dogshit til its over.

 

Get ready for flies fcuking part 2!!!!!!!!!

 

Surprise hit of 2010, Salt, got the green light for a sequel and development is quickly underway.

 

 

http://www.getthebigpicture.net/blog/2011/...-on-salt-2.html

 

I agree - Salt sucked, the Losers was ok.

I'm curious how you would like KickAss, RomanDad. I loved it.

I agree - Salt sucked, the Losers was ok.

I'm curious how you would like KickAss, RomanDad. I loved it.

 

KickAss was awesomely funny, imo, I really hope they do get around to making the sequel. I also thought Aaron Johnson did a really good interpretation of Dave and Chloë Moretz' interpretation of Hit-Girl was disturbingly entertaining. There are quite a few deviations from the graphic novel, but unlike many such adaptations they just made it different enough to still be a lot of fun, rather than a broken rewrite.

But, it is a fairly niche movie, imo, and probably not that suited to a wider-appeal (and certainly wouldn't recommend it as family-friendly, hah).