Pick that one out of the net

I really hope he'll end up in Madrid. I know he's a big fan of Cristiano. Having them both in one team would be awesome.

Arrrrrrrggggghhhhhhh! No it wouldn't. Bale needs to stay exactly where he is.

Ronaldo needs to come back home to Manchester United

 

It will be interesting to see what happens if Mourinho leaves Real. I cant believe how spoilt the RM fans are, calling for Laudrup or Ancelotti. Or even...giggle...Benitez.

Nathan Nathan Nathan... you are worst than my ex for taking things completely out of context!

 

It it the way they go on as if he is the Welsh messiah. He isn't. You cannot compare him to Ronaldo.. Ronaldo has won things.

 

 

Ronaldo has taken hold of matches and done it all game. Bale you get a lot of quietness through the game. That is unless you watch ITV coverage and he touches the ball just inside the opposition half you get "BAAAAAALLLLLLLEEEE" from the commentators.

So annoying.

 

Then today, one of my favourite footie websites write this.

 

Bale Fest

Thankfully there has been no over-the-top reaction to Gareth Bale's rather decent form. The English media have definitely not got the slightest bit carried away. Oh no.

 

As an experiment, Mediawatch tried Control F and then searched for 'Bale' on the football front page of the Daily Mail website at 10.30am on Wednesday.

 

There were 44 matches. 44 (forty-four) matches! To put this into context, there were only 38 matches for the word 'football'.

 

This Bale-fest includes 13 separate articles about the man we're contractually obliged to call the 'Welsh Wizard'. Namely:

 

Rio: Think Bale is on the same level as Ronaldo? You don't know football!

Unstoppable...but how long before Gareth bails out?

How AVB turned Bale into...the Predator!

Chris Waddle: Bale will be worth 70mn if he produces this form in the Champions League

Matt Le Tissier: Even as a 17-yr-old at Southampton, Bale was a class apart

Keep Bale in Blighty: Sportsmail launches campaign

Bale knocked stuffing out of West Ham AND Arsenal with wonder goal

I haven't turned Spurs into a one-man team, insists Bale

REVEALED: How Bale came close to dropping into the Championship!

Top 10 Spurs players of all time...is Bale good enough to join?

Bale deserves to be player of the year says AVB

Today's poll...Should Bale quit Spurs this summer?

Bale hits last-gasp stunner to hand Spurs three points

 

That's 13 separate articles from a total of 52 football-related items on their site, giving Bale exactly 25% market share in the world of football newsworthiness. Wow. Imagine if he won something.

 

 

Let's focus for a minute on one of those headlines: 'Keep Bale in Blighty: Sportsmail launches campaign'.

 

Yes, that's a campaign - complete with logo seemingly drawn on a Mac by a five-year-old - to stop Bale joining any of those nasty foreign clubs. Mediawatch's challenge to you is to keep down the bile as you read on...

 

* 'The Barclays Premier League needs Gareth Bale. English football needs Gareth Bale.'

 

* 'He must be viewed by a generation of starry-eyed kids.'

 

* 'The Premier League needs heroes. And at the moment, Gareth Bale is the right kind of one.'

 

Recovered your stomach? Let's read on as Neil Moxley writes: 'It has been repeatedly thrown at him that the 23-year-old Welsh wizard 'doesn't fancy it'.'

 

Has it? Has it really? Mediawatch googled 'Gareth Bale doesn't fancy it' and simply generated links to the Daily Mail's 'Keep Bale in Blighty' campaign and a news story about Ashley Williams really not 'fancying' coming up against Bale. Well, who would?

 

Moxley has clearly been taking lessons from Oliver Holt (the king of the genre) on the finer points of the straw man argument. What's that phrase about wise men never arguing with fools again?

 

 

Forgive us while we turn again to the Daily Mail (so you don't have to) and Sami Mokbel's piece about AVB transforming Bale into a 'predator'. He begins with an obligatory nod to Harry Redknapp...

 

'Former Spurs manager Harry Redknapp's influence on Bale's career is undeniable. Taking a player who was widely recognised as a left back and transforming him into one of the most feared wingers on the planet is something Redknapp should reflect on with immense pride when he retires to his Sandbanks residence.'

 

Is this the same Redknapp who still insisted after Bale's devastating performances on the wing against Inter Milan in 2010 that "in the long term I eventually see Gareth dropping back and playing at left-back where he can be one of the best, if not the best"?

 

Rednapp even admitted that Bale was only playing on the wing because Benoit Assou-Ekotto is a rather good left-back.

 

But well done, Harry, well done

And as much as Joey is a cock this makes me laugh

 

 

 

Nathan Nathan Nathan... you are worst than my ex for taking things completely out of context!

 

Maybe he isn't THAT great but honestly there's nothing more interesting going on in the league right now. The racism saga is over, Balotelli is gone, the press needs to create the next big thing. I look forward to seeing him play, can't really say that about anyone else right now.

 

That Barton gif is hilarious. Zlatan's response is pretty easy to figure out too

Update

Because we know you care, and we do these things for you to keep you sane and away from such dark corners of the internet, we thought we'd update you on how many mentions Gareth Bale gets on The Daily Mail football page.

 

Just the 26 today.

 

The gloss is fading, clearly.

 

 

Socking It

Still, they do find room for another exciting addition to the Bale canon, with this vital story:

 

'Gareth Bale has been socking it to opposition teams all season, but now Sportsmail can reveal one of the secrets of his success.

 

'The Tottenham star, 23, has been spotted wearing special non-slip socks, which claim to help anchor a player's feet inside his boots, improving traction and increasing acceleration.

 

'The £24.99 'Trusox', which are imported from the USA, are also used by the likes of Chelsea duo Demba Ba and Victor Moses.

 

'They are marketed as helping to make players feel more secure and confident in their boots.'

 

They even provide a video clip instructing us 'how to wear' these socks.

 

Tomorrow: how Bale's choice of jockstrap is helping him get dip on those free-kicks.

 

Are you starting to get picture of how nauseous this charade is?

 

The league has got stars, Aguerrrrrrooooo, Mata, Oscar at Chelsea etc but instead we get de-stabilising stories about Bale to Madrid Rooney to PSG and Suarez to Bayern and it is just pathetic journalism. This season is tame unless teams start dropping random points.

Bale needs a snorkle.

 

He was kept quiet today by either Lucas Gerrard or Carra! That last one sums it up for me!

Bale is good and yes I think he would be good fun in a LFC shirt but for Carra, a guy about to retire to keep him quiet says quite a bit!

 

The fourth position race and the relegation battle is going to be interesting. I am not sure if LFC can get fourth so I am not going to lose anymore hair or nails over it.

 

Someone quote that for me though!

 

 

Kompany is a class all round. I really like him not jst as a player but as a nice guy to. Excellent role model.

OH FFS SUAREZ.

What is it with him and biting? If it was anyone else at Liverpool they would be gone, he could get a ban till the end of the season though.

Last week he says in a national interview that his wife tells him off about his conduct to players and the ref so he says he will improve.

 

This week...

 

With the ball he is great, off it and you have to wonder about his mental well being. The press are having a field day with this but hey Torres elbows someone in the head and that is nothing.

 

It's like he hasnt learned anything despite all the controversies that he has started in the past. Time for LFC to let him go, methinks.

They need to setup a new capaing "Let's Kick Cannibalism Out Of Football"

Guardian newspaper headline was genuis

 

"Eats, shoots, leaves?"

 

 

 

Real Madrid have had enough chances tonight to get back into this tie. Not sure this is their night.

Real Madrid have had enough chances tonight to get back into this tie. Not sure this is their night.

 

I'm pissed. No "decima" for Real probably means that Mourinho will leave. He already hinted that in an interview after the game Having three Poles in the final is a slight consolation.

I would be livid being a Real Madrid fan and having to watch Ozil every week

I have yet to look at his possession and pass completion rates for last night but I bet the percentage figure reads "are you shitting me?%".

 

ITV interviewed Mourinho and he was about to drop some knowledge and the fuckers went to the presenter to go to adverts. Dicks.

Who willanage Real then? Will Ronaldo still be there?

I would be livid being a Real Madrid fan and having to watch Ozil every week

I have yet to look at his possession and pass completion rates for last night but I bet the percentage figure reads "are you shitting me?%".

 

ITV interviewed Mourinho and he was about to drop some knowledge and the fuckers went to the presenter to go to adverts. Dicks.

Who willanage Real then? Will Ronaldo still be there?

 

Main candidate is Ancelotti, second one Heynckes (who already won CL with Real) but he was supposed to retire at the end of the season. Ronaldo said yesterday that it doesn't matter to him if Mourinho stays or leaves. He has the contract until the end of 2014/15 season and there are some serious doubts if he'll sign a new one.

Fergie is to go, not 5 days after saying he would not.

 

It had to happen one day, I never thought it would be quite so sudden.

Thanks for everything, Sir Alex.

So Moyes in at Manure

 

Mancini out at shitey.

 

What with Chelsea looking for a new manager come the last game that is the top three clubs changing managers this summer.

In total, in the top 7 clubs 4 will be changing managers. Maybe 5 if Arsenal wake up.

Slow start to the transfer merry go round but interesting moves in the managerial hot seats all through Europe.

 

PSG have Fabio

Jose at CFC

Is Ancelotti going to Real Madrid?

 

I think Chelsea are going to spend big on a striker.

I think Suarez will go to Real.

 

Anyone else heard any other interesting sniffs of news?

Ancelotti, Bale, Suarez, and Isco to Real and I will be delighted. I hated on Suarez pretty hard here but there's no denying he's one of the best strikers in the world at the moment. I'm tired of Higuain (Arsenal?) fvcking up 100% chances all the time in the big games.

 

Perez was in London this week. Officially doing some deals for his construction bussiness but we all know the real reason. Sorry SAB

Im suprised that Real havent announced a new coach yet. They're running out of time and candidates.