Where to draw the line bewteen friends and employees?

So, there is a couple we have been friends with for about 8 years. They have been one of the closest couples to us since we have know them. The best man at their wedding was referred to my business. He managed to hit it off with an employee of mine, who has been with us several years.

 

I didnt think much of it at the time. Actually, my employee is very uptight/controlling and this guy is bat shit crazy, so I thought it may be good for her. He could break her like a horse. Fast forward a year....They are engaged.

 

How do I manage this?

 

Here is the deal. She is a great employee. Awesome. But, her personal life is a wreck. She is the type to creates drama as a hobby, and is controlling. Now, she is showing up at the same social events as us. She acts like we arent even there. More oddly, she is brown nosing my wifes best friend to gain her attention. I dont mind a healthy relationship with employees, and her work performance hasnt changed. But, outside of work, she has a bad habit of being the alpha mare.

 

It seems that she is trying to gain control over our friends, as. is she is getting even for the fast that we are her boss at work,

 

Any recommendations on what to do, or do nothing at all? A bad reaction can affect both sides of this.

It seems that she is trying to gain control over our friends, as. is she is getting even for the fast that we are her boss at work,

 

Any recommendations on what to do, or do nothing at all? A bad reaction can affect both sides of this.

You are taking this stuff too seriously. It just sounds like your employee is socializing with others regardless if you happen to be friends with them or not... How would an employee "get back" at his boss by befriending his friends? Assuming there is something over which she feels the need to "get back" at. Yes some people are "alphas" and attract others around them, that's the way their personality is, I see nothing wrong there, especially considering this has not affected her work in any way.

Boner...in the words of Kenny Rogers "You got to know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em, Know when to walk away and know when to run.....".

You're going to have to let this play out until your employee crosses the line. Any move you make before then will put YOU on the wrong side of the fence. You will be seen as the bad guy. And if what you say is true that would be just what she wants in order to gain the upper hand over you.

Be patient, if she has nefarious intentions they will reveal themselves soon enough. Sounds like you could have reason to be concerned. Just make triple sure all your bases are covered as far as company policy & the law are concerned where her work performance is concerned.

 

 

Good Luck!!

Only one solution - sleep with her.

So, there is a couple we have been friends with for about 8 years. They have been one of the closest couples to us since we have know them. The best man at their wedding was referred to my business. He managed to hit it off with an employee of mine, who has been with us several years.

 

I didnt think much of it at the time. Actually, my employee is very uptight/controlling and this guy is bat shit crazy, so I thought it may be good for her. He could break her like a horse. Fast forward a year....They are engaged.

 

How do I manage this?

 

Here is the deal. She is a great employee. Awesome. But, her personal life is a wreck. She is the type to creates drama as a hobby, and is controlling. Now, she is showing up at the same social events as us. She acts like we arent even there. More oddly, she is brown nosing my wifes best friend to gain her attention. I dont mind a healthy relationship with employees, and her work performance hasnt changed. But, outside of work, she has a bad habit of being the alpha mare.

 

It seems that she is trying to gain control over our friends, as. is she is getting even for the fast that we are her boss at work,

 

Any recommendations on what to do, or do nothing at all? A bad reaction can affect both sides of this.

 

Subjugate he at social events by always introducing her as one of your employees. Verbally mark her with your pee: You see her talking to a friend of yours, go over and jokingly say "hey! you're not trying to hire her away from me are you!". Ask her "you're going to get xyz done for me b monday right?" in front of other people. Be her boss outside the office and she'll stop liking it. treat her differently outside the office and she'll try to reverse the power relationship.

 

or fcuk her.

Only one solution - sleep with her.

 

I'm with porter, sometime women don't fall into line til you blow a load on their face.

Only one solution - sleep with her.

 

I know you are already booked, but will you allow yourself to be my hero? Thanks for the consideration.

 

Best

Thanks guys. I will let this blow over (not on her). I dont think they will stay together anyway. Its pretty bad.

 

We may be a little jealous, I admit. However, she has done many manipulative things in the past.

 

One thing that she will do is talk bad about us in her private life. I know this because it gets back to us. If she does this with our friends and they tell us, do I just let it go?

You are taking this stuff too seriously. It just sounds like your employee is socializing with others regardless if you happen to be friends with them or not..

 

This is not the only time this has happened. I can think of 4-5 different social groups this has happened to.

 

Also, there was a situation a couple years ago where she confronted my wife and told us that we could not talk to someone because they were "her" friend. :-)

 

Anything is possible, thats why I asked. A few years ago, her mom faked her own abduction. The police got involved. She did it for attention. This is what type of personality we are dealing with.

 

Good worker though. In fact, all she does is work. She has 3 jobs at times. Part of it is that she really has no friends....I mean zero. Everyone is temporary in her life.

Boner...in the words of Kenny Rogers "You got to know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em, Know when to walk away and know when to run.....".

You're going to have to let this play out until your employee crosses the line. Any move you make before then will put YOU on the wrong side of the fence. You will be seen as the bad guy. And if what you say is true that would be just what she wants in order to gain the upper hand over you.

Be patient, if she has nefarious intentions they will reveal themselves soon enough. Sounds like you could have reason to be concerned. Just make triple sure all your bases are covered as far as company policy & the law are concerned where her work performance is concerned.

 

 

Good Luck!!

 

Great advice!

Only one solution - sleep with her.

 

The more I work around women, the more I hate them. Not possible. She has STDs anyway. 1/4 people have herpes, so at least one of you who have responded have them.

The more I work around women, the more I hate them. Not possible. She has STDs anyway. 1/4 people have herpes, so at least one of you who have responded have them.

 

It's not me. Post a picture, maybe it's worth getting.

I dont think they will stay together anyway.

 

 

Everyone is temporary in her life.

 

 

And so shall this situation.. you answered your own question.

 

Why do you keep her on payroll? An employee like that is a ticking time bomb. As soon as she slips up, I'd give her the boot, personally.

 

Ignore it. Not worth it, she's accomplishing everything she wants by you noticing and addressing these issues. One thing I know about batshit crazy people, is that the less you pla attention to their games, the more crazy they get (lol) and eventually they won't pull that shyt on you anymore.

 

I got a headache just reading about her stories. Wow.

This is not the only time this has happened. I can think of 4-5 different social groups this has happened to.

 

Also, there was a situation a couple years ago where she confronted my wife and told us that we could not talk to someone because they were "her" friend. :-)

 

Anything is possible, thats why I asked. A few years ago, her mom faked her own abduction. The police got involved. She did it for attention. This is what type of personality we are dealing with.

 

Good worker though. In fact, all she does is work. She has 3 jobs at times. Part of it is that she really has no friends....I mean zero. Everyone is temporary in her life.

 

How long has this woman been in your employment? Has she had many previous employers before coming to work for you?

An employee like that is a ticking time bomb.

 

Ignore it. Not worth it, she's accomplishing everything she wants by you noticing and addressing these issues.

 

I agree!

How long has this woman been in your employment? Has she had many previous employers before coming to work for you?

 

9-10 years. The job before me was 5 years. She quit there because I offered here a job. I didnt know she was crazy. Actually very good at her job.

The more I work around women, the more I hate them. Not possible. She has STDs anyway. 1/4 people have herpes, so at least one of you who have responded have them.

It's me. Honestly the surface area of my special soldier is so pockmarked it looks like a turtle shell.

 

Are you actually sure this is a genuine issue, the employee not the std. Have you raised any concerns with someone else in your social group?

 

Ps with the thread title as it is, have you been hunting wabbits?

The more I work around women, the more I hate them. Not possible. She has STDs anyway. 1/4 people have herpes, so at least one of you who have responded have them.

 

 

Alright, alright...which one of you is it!!!???

Alright, alright...which one of you is it!!!???

 

I only have the above the belt version.

Fire fast, hire slow.

I only have the above the belt version.

Boner, you crack me up

I separate it when I walk out the door of my offices.

I separate it when I walk out the door of my offices.

 

You mean that nobody is allow to be a friend from work, or everyone is?