Lightning Report post Posted August 10, 2016 There's a great book called the Charisma Myth that you should read, it breaks down a lot of what you're talking about. Charisma is what allows someone to own a room and it's made of 3 things: Warmth, Presence and Power. Warmth: Are you approachable, friendly etc Presence: Are you actually listening to to me while I talk? Power: Do you have the ability to impact my life if a meaningful way? Now that I've told you these 3 things you'll catch yourself doing it with people you meet; it's a natural response we all have which means learning how to be better at them will help a lot. PS - Currently reading Shoe Dog by Phil Knight - had no idea he could write so well, super inspiring story. I instantly thought of Tony Robbins when reading those traits/descriptions. Perfect example IMO. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
SV-N-IT Report post Posted August 10, 2016 I instantly thought of Tony Robbins when reading those traits/descriptions. Perfect example IMO. watch I'm not your guru on netflix life changing IMO Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrDoctor Report post Posted August 10, 2016 watch I'm not your guru on netflix life changing IMO Forgot about this one, need to watch it! Tony Robbins is a cool dude, love him. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luxeous Report post Posted August 10, 2016 watch I'm not your guru on netflix life changing IMO Yeah I saw that, was really eye opening as I have never been to one of his things before. Love how he genuinely cares about making an impact. I've been listening to some of his podcasts lately and he had Jay Abraham on there for a 2 part series. As a business owner they are 2 of the best podcasts I have ever listened to, bar none. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kerplop Report post Posted August 10, 2016 Since this is random coffee talk... I'm sipping on coffee, looking at lambo parts, and impatiently waiting for my parts for my jalpa to arrive. I'm feeling on cloud 9 because life is pretty good at the moment. I've got a girlfriend who is utterly fantastic, work has been great, I'm slowly creeping back into investing, the jalpa is nearing completion, and I keep having to pinch myself. Life is good. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrDoctor Report post Posted August 10, 2016 Yeah I saw that, was really eye opening as I have never been to one of his things before. Love how he genuinely cares about making an impact. I've been listening to some of his podcasts lately and he had Jay Abraham on there for a 2 part series. As a business owner they are 2 of the best podcasts I have ever listened to, bar none. TR has a podcast? Never knew, gotta check that out. Since this is random coffee talk... I'm sipping on coffee, looking at lambo parts, and impatiently waiting for my parts for my jalpa to arrive. I'm feeling on cloud 9 because life is pretty good at the moment. I've got a girlfriend who is utterly fantastic, work has been great, I'm slowly creeping back into investing, the jalpa is nearing completion, and I keep having to pinch myself. Life is good. Man, I might need to go grab some coffee. Trying really hard to avoid it, but pretty much didn't sleep until 1am, woke up at 530am, went to the gym from 6-8am, and am now feeling a little tired. I know that feeling! I try to be grateful for everyday. I'm not perfect at it, but today is going to be a good day for me! Will probably be taking the convertible down to Monterey, run some errands, and on my way, grab an espresso . Feels so damn good when life is going according to plan. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kerplop Report post Posted August 10, 2016 TR has a podcast? Never knew, gotta check that out. Man, I might need to go grab some coffee. Trying really hard to avoid it, but pretty much didn't sleep until 1am, woke up at 530am, went to the gym from 6-8am, and am now feeling a little tired. I know that feeling! I try to be grateful for everyday. I'm not perfect at it, but today is going to be a good day for me! Will probably be taking the convertible down to Monterey, run some errands, and on my way, grab an espresso . Feels so damn good when life is going according to plan. 2015 was a shit show for me. 2016 has been absolutely great. 2015 was filled with massive depression episodes, nearing the point of suicide, a nasty toxic relationship (which aided to the depression swings), and a girlfriend of the time thrashing my house. You could say that anything after that point was an improvement. But hey! I'm still alive and happy now Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
SV-N-IT Report post Posted August 10, 2016 Yeah I saw that, was really eye opening as I have never been to one of his things before. Love how he genuinely cares about making an impact. I've been listening to some of his podcasts lately and he had Jay Abraham on there for a 2 part series. As a business owner they are 2 of the best podcasts I have ever listened to, bar none. I'm going to check out these podcasts. loved his documentary and it happened to be filmed 2 minutes from my house! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrDoctor Report post Posted August 10, 2016 2015 was a shit show for me. 2016 has been absolutely great. 2015 was filled with massive depression episodes, nearing the point of suicide, a nasty toxic relationship (which aided to the depression swings), and a girlfriend of the time thrashing my house. You could say that anything after that point was an improvement. But hey! I'm still alive and happy now Glad you got yourself out of that situation Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kerplop Report post Posted August 11, 2016 Glad you got yourself out of that situation Yep. Don't move in with crazy.... or just live by yourself forever and avoid the hassle entirely. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
topcabron Report post Posted August 11, 2016 Watching olympics Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrDoctor Report post Posted August 11, 2016 Watching olympics I love sports, but can't do the Olympics. So boring. Unless you're watching sport specific only I.e. basketball, cycling. Then I could watch. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smash Boy Report post Posted August 11, 2016 I love sports, but can't do the Olympics. So boring. Unless you're watching sport specific only I.e. basketball, cycling. Then I could watch. Can't even do a 100 meter dash? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
topcabron Report post Posted August 11, 2016 watching that Kazak weightlifter set the world record , seeing some human drama unfold I love seeing great story lines and some of these athletes have amazing stories. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fortis Report post Posted August 11, 2016 watching that Kazak weightlifter set the world record , seeing some human drama unfold I love seeing great story lines and some of these athletes have amazing stories. Very exciting, also some events are relatively short, I hate being glue to the TV for hours just to find out who won Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
NuclearJACK Report post Posted August 11, 2016 I'm not a coffee drinker, I don't really like hot drinks so I drink sugar free red bull instead. The amount I shit I get from coffee drinks over it that have no clue that its less caffeine then in their damn coffees drives me crazy. The small cans only have 80mg which is like a very small coffee. Im not sure if I have social anxiety or just shy. I might be in between the 2 if that's possible. but it made me wonder how many people that have social anxiety are Lamborghini level successful. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
cake Report post Posted August 11, 2016 Im not sure if I have social anxiety or just shy. I might be in between the 2 if that's possible. but it made me wonder how many people that have social anxiety are Lamborghini level successful.i wouldn't judge anyone's financial level of success based on car ownership. One can buy an expensive car and not afford it. Some folks finance everything. They may appear outwardly successful but on paper have very little. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrDoctor Report post Posted August 11, 2016 I'm not a coffee drinker, I don't really like hot drinks so I drink sugar free red bull instead. The amount I shit I get from coffee drinks over it that have no clue that its less caffeine then in their damn coffees drives me crazy. The small cans only have 80mg which is like a very small coffee. Im not sure if I have social anxiety or just shy. I might be in between the 2 if that's possible. but it made me wonder how many people that have social anxiety are Lamborghini level successful. Tons of weirdos in silicon valley. I'm sure some can afford a Lamborghini. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrDoctor Report post Posted August 11, 2016 Can't even do a 100 meter dash? Lol If I had $ on it, sure! I just don't find most olympic sports interesting so I wouldn't watch it just to watch it. If it was just on somewhere then maybe. I turned on USA/China basketball and even that didn't seem competitive to me. Didn't even watch 5 mins. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tara Report post Posted August 11, 2016 Haven't been sleeping well at night this week. Having a coffee this morning, sugar milk with a dash of coffee is how I like mine. I only like iced coffee never really a fan of hot coffee. I enjoy being around people but love my alone time. I hate when people feel the need to speak to me because we are in the same place like in an elevator or in a public bathroom. I'll give a smile while passing in the office hallway but I don't want to speak to you. Yesterday I was washing my hands as a woman from inside a stall decided to tell me how she wishes it was Friday. On Sunday I went by a friend's house who was having a garage sale and one of our other friends was smoking. An older man came up to us asking if we had any silver or coins and we said no. He proceeded to tell us he used to bleed out of his penis and any other opening because of smoking and had to have many surgeries. We all had this look: . I understand he was trying to scare the person who was smoking but DUDE! I don't want to know that! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
rmtn Report post Posted August 11, 2016 I drink coffee in Italy, every where else: sugar free Red Bull. True, Ice coffee is good actually. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
yellomurci Report post Posted August 11, 2016 i wouldn't judge anyone's financial level of success based on car ownership. One can buy an expensive car and not afford it. Some folks finance everything. They may appear outwardly successful but on paper have very little. I had an employee once that had a nice car (better than his pay grade would suggest) but lived in a small apartment in the wrong part of town. I did ask him about this once and he said "people see me in my car but not where I live" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
NuclearJACK Report post Posted August 11, 2016 i wouldn't judge anyone's financial level of success based on car ownership. One can buy an expensive car and not afford it. Some folks finance everything. They may appear outwardly successful but on paper have very little. Indeed, I actually know someone that is the opposite. He could afford a Lamborghini but his daily driver is a used Chrysler 300 V6 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fortis Report post Posted August 11, 2016 Indeed, I actually know someone that is the opposite. He could afford a Lamborghini but his daily driver is a used Chrysler 300 V6 That's why he can afford a Lamborghini Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Supercar Ace Report post Posted August 11, 2016 Just caught up... Well said, thank you all. Can't forget about focusing on my strengths. I'm the same way as you Doc. I shop with earphones in so I don't have to chat or look busy, lol. I honestly just don't understand how people who carry the room and are B.S.ers get so ahead, especially in the workplace. I've met people in high positions who shouldn't be there, just because of their people skills. I just wonder, WTF, who put this idiot in charge? Can't people see through this? That this person is fluff, and has no idea what he/she is talking about? Sorry for the rant! Guess that goes back to focusing on strengths ! Being a good "people person" comes down to one thing in my experience: People feeling like you actually listen to them. Sometimes a simple "how's the day treating you?" is all it takes. Usually after their "BS" short answer of "fine, good, or ok" I usually asking "just (insert response they used here)?" I've heard a lot of interesting and cool life stories that way. Funny is that I am a hardcore introvert by nature, I love nothing more than my own quiet space. But I have found that I can socialize well with people and that's helped with everything in life. Life is a contact sport, and the more people you contact, the better you'll do. I think there's a lot of interesting this you can learn from people, especially one on one. I can make a new friend anywhere I go, which I find funny since I tend not to really care about other people as a whole. As others have stated, there are some good books and podcasts on the subject, but in all honesty it comes down to how much you practice and use it. Social skills are like any other skill; it is something you can acquire and master though dedication and practice. But you have to be willing to make the effort. Know what your end goal is and never lose site of that. Hell you can PM me and we can have an off-line chat about it sometime 2015 was a shit show for me. 2016 has been absolutely great. 2015 was filled with massive depression episodes, nearing the point of suicide, a nasty toxic relationship (which aided to the depression swings), and a girlfriend of the time thrashing my house. You could say that anything after that point was an improvement. But hey! I'm still alive and happy now Glad you're out of that and doing well. Never move in with a chick unless you're planning to marry her within 6 months is my rule. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
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