Bad start to 2014

So I'm just coming here to vent a little bit and just look for some words of encouragement. This year has become an absolute roller coaster for me.

 

As some of you may know, I was in a 4 man harmony singing country band in Nashville and we were getting close to signing a record deal. Unfortunately we had a member of the band who was struggling with some personal issues and we had to part ways with him. He was our high harmony singer, and that's probably one of the most difficult singers to find. Especially when you're looking for a certain age range and fit for a band. Anyway, we struggled a few months to find the right fit, had a couple guys that seemed like they were going to work but just didn't fit. Fast forward to January of this year, things just start getting weird between our manager and us. Also, one of the other band members (we'll call him Josh) is beginning to become very distant. Well, me and the other band member (we'll call him Tom) are starting to notice because he and I haven't talked to our manager in a little over a week (which is weird because we usually talk and keep in touch each day). So I approach Josh and ask him what's going on because he's been talking to our manager everyday. He acts like nothing is wrong and gets mad that I would even think somethings going on. I let it go, and towards the end of January, it just gets worse. We do a luncheon for our managers birthday with all of us band guys. Our manager is just incredibly rude to me and Tom, but very conversational with Josh. So at this point I know something is up. To make a long story short, I find out that they planned to break off from the band and the manager just wants to manage Josh alone. When I find this out, I'm devastated. I've know this manager for 5 years and brought this person INTO our circle to help manager the band and trusted them. Also, I would have called Josh probably one of my best friends. Needless to say, 2 years of my life was just ripped out from under me and left with nothing.

 

Not only this, but all of the band and I just moved into a house together February 1st, and since I'm the only one with good credit, I'm the only one on the lease so we could get approved. Well I just learned that they have ALL decided to dip out and leave me with the full $2500 rent on April 1st. Since it's so last minute, I scrambling to find new roommates, but they can't move in until June 1st, which means I'm left to pay the rent for 2 months!

 

Not only that, I have no job because music was full time with the band. So, I immediately contact Apple about coming back to work for them since I worked there for over a year. I left only because of music and left on very good terms; great company to work for and very supportive of the arts. So, I got an interview, went well. Got a second interview, went well, so I thought. Then got an automated email response they decided to continue with other candidates (WTF).

 

So I'm just going to detail cars in the meantime to make money, but at this point, I just can't help but feel defeated and I'm trying to shake that feeling and bounce back. Money is just becoming extremely tight and I can't stand that I have to ask my parents for help, but at the current moment I have no other options but to do so.

 

I know most everyone on here is a self made man, and I'm sure that many of you have been through much worse and just looking for some words of encouragement right now. Just feeling a little hopeless and completely back to ground zero with everything that I had built the past 2 years. Thanks to those for taking the time to read my rant!

Tough situation Matt. Almost every poster in the business thread echoed the same sentiment of never taking a partner in business unless absolutely necessary and I can see it extends to your situation as well. The good news is all those guys found out the hard way by dealing with conflict with their partners and all of them bounced back and are better than ever. You'll bounce back, good luck, and the manager can go fcuk himself

Tough situation Matt. Almost every poster in the business thread echoed the same sentiment of never taking a partner in business unless absolutely necessary and I can see it extends to your situation as well. The good news is all those guys found out the hard way by dealing with conflict with their partners and all of them bounced back and are better than ever. You'll bounce back, good luck, and the manager can go fcuk himself

 

 

Stay strong Matt

 

Business isn't always butterflies and unicorns

 

Keep at it, your chance will come

My father in law has been involved with barbershop, chorus, and harmony singing for over sixty years. The Barbershop Harmony Society headquarters and museum is in Nashville. My father in law is involved as a curator. That society has thousands of members. If you aren't a member it may be a good way to meet like minded individuals. Here is a link. Hope everything turns around. Good luck.

I'm a strong believer in the fact that everything happens for a reason. You may not know why now, but when things click together in a little while it will all make sense. People come and go into our lives, some are worth while other are not; to me it sounds like life has just filtered the unnecessary ones from yours. Head and chin up, things can only get better from here.

 

Tough breaks but it's not the end of the world. You sound like you learned some good lessons for going into the future. Going to your parents as a last resort if that is an option just means you have a good family, no shame in that. I hope when and if the need comes my kids will always know I am there for them. Sounds like this May be the start of a new solo career!

I agree, it sounds like you learned some tough but good lessons. Anything that doesn't kill you just makes you stronger, so keep going and trying. I've had several business, business ideas and things that I put a ton of time and money into that just didn't work out. However, instead of looking at them as failures I looked at the lessons learned from those ideas and business as building blocks for future ideas and projects. Also everything in life is up and downs, and you can't have one without the other. Very few people are born and then just have constant success in everything they do with no failures. Good luck, I'm sure you will pull through.

I appreciate all the kind words of encouragement guys. Now that it's been two months, I'm beginning to have some clarity on it all, and I am glad it happened now before any success really happened with the band and I do see myself better off without them.

 

I am going to give another shot as a solo artist, but in the meantime also be learning tour managing skills. That way if the singing doesn't work out, I can try and get a job as a tour manager. I know I want to be involved in the business one way or another, just going to try and have some options this time!

Keep you chin up buddy, it's a rough business but perseverance will take you places you never imagined.

 

And no matter how badly you feel fucked right now by your ex-partners, manager, etc. Try not to burn any bridges, it seems like a pretty tight knit industry and a good, or bad image on your part could be a make it or break it kind of thing.

 

I guess the minimal lesson here is make sure everyone has some skin in the game. At least in terms of your rental it seemed like they had nothing to lose.

focus on the positive things in your life

its easy to say, but you will perceiver

As the others said, think positive and learn from the experience. (easy said than done of course) I have had people I have been involved with bend me over as well... hard to look at the bright side after that. I too have brought someone into my circle who has turned around and screwed me bigtime.. I know that sting well.

 

It could be worse, you could have been related to them... makes the sting 10x worse.

Sorry to hear that Matt, but I am sure its for the best. Before you know it you will be back into something else bigger and better, and hopefully involved with people who wont stab you in the back.

Chin up and work harder than you've ever worked before, everything happens for a reason.

 

 

Keep your focus, and surround yourself with positive people. Yes, this situation sucks a lot, but learn from it, dust yourself off, and you'll come out the other side. The human spirit is only defeated when we stop trying, so keep moving and you'll get past this storm.

Consider it a challenge and a lesson learned. While the world is getting more complicated and perhaps less trustworthy, it doesn't mean it's time to throw in the towel. Perseverance is a virtue. Hard work along with calculated moves will always pay off; perhaps not immediately or even in the near future, but it will have positive results. Best of luck!

Sorry to hear about all your struggles Matt. Seems like there are times when life kicks you down hard. One thing after another. I've been there.

It's hard to think positive when you are overwhelmed by all the negative shit. The best advice I can give you is to try to channel the disappointment and anger at something that can get you ahead. Even if it's working on your fitness. Anything that will give you a sense of accomplishing something positive.

Things will get better, and at some point, you will look back at this as a learning experience and you will be stronger because of it.

All the best,

Phil

I understand where you are coming from. We all deal with those things in business.

 

This quote has helped me, and I have found it to be very true, I hope it helps you as well.

 

"Remember.....before something great happens, everything falls apart"

 

Stay Strong, Stay Focused, Stay Positive......it will take you where you want to go.

Focus and make sure to look up at the next oppotunity.

Sorry to hear. Just a few years ago, I went through a similar scenario. Nothing seems to be working out the way I planned. Seriously thought about giving up my business. But I stayed and persevered. As long as you have commitment and determination, you'll find a way to bounce back and kick ass.

Just so you know, verbal leases up to a year are recognized. The fact you are in a band and that they also applied for the lease(I hope they did this and you didn't take them at their word) would be good supporting evidence for you.

 

Also, any renter has to have certified mail 30 day notice that they are moving out.

Chin up.

 

I've just had the two worst years in my life. I had to set everything aside, my buisness, my social life and pretty much everything good in life, in order to be there for my mother/family. I'm starting to see the light again and so will you. Good things come to good people.

Keep your chin up!

Sorry to here that Matt. When I went through a rough time in my professional life, I turned every setback into a relentless drive to do more. I have no doubt that just about every successful person on this forum has hit a low point; thankfully that's never the end of the road.

 

The good news is that you choose what happens next.

 

Most of us can offer you a good advice and/or moral support. Remember is up to you move foward and get over it.

 

Like Luxeous said: "The good news is that you choose what happens next."

Sorry to hear about your partners effing you over. Haven't been the best of times here either. But as said, most people go through some rough times. Use this to further fuel your desire to succeed and drive on.